The Moment I Realized a Small Change Could Leave a Lasting Impression… 

I joined a business review meeting that included Executive Leadership. It wasn’t a call I was running, but I was a stakeholder on the project. As the meeting began, I heard a coworker open with, “Hello everyone! How are you doing today? I hope you had a great weekend. We have a lot of exciting content to get through today.”   

From the outside, this sounded like a perfectly normal way to start a meeting. Honestly, it’s very similar to how I would open one myself. What caught my attention wasn’t what was said, but who it was said by.  

I had never heard this coworker ask how anyone was doing. I had never heard them mention life outside of work or take a moment to connect on a human level in our everyday interactions. The contrast is what made this moment stand out to me, and I wondered why the sudden shift. 

Intent vs Impact 

I want to be clear about something: this isn’t a personal attack on anyone. That’s not the intention of this story. We all have different communication styles and personalities, and I genuinely value learning those differences in the people I work with. I know my style. I’m the person who opens meetings with a personal connection and high energy. I ask about how you are doing. I ask your kids, your pets, and your weekend. I want to talk about what’s going on in your life. That’s who I am. But I also understand that this isn’t everyone’s vibe and that’s okay.   

What matters to me is consistency. Consistency is a critical piece of the impact you have on others. Whether I’m chatting with the person behind the scenes or passing a C-level executive in the hallway, how I approach them does not change. My approach to connecting with others is steady and intentional, no matter the circumstances. 

My gut tells me that this coworker doesn’t naturally gravitate toward small talk or personal connection. Some people lead with efficiency and output, not conversation or relationship building, and that doesn’t make them wrong, it’s simply who they are. Perhaps, in the presence of executive leadership, they felt the need to be more warm and friendly and build relationships in a way that felt appropriate for the moment. If that’s the case, I can’t fault them for the intention behind their actions. 

 My Leadership Lesson 

Here’s the leadership lesson I couldn’t ignore: If we only work hard to show that kind of care when titles are present, people notice. When someone sees a different version of you reserved only for leadership, it can leave them quietly wondering: Do they care about me? Do I matter to them? Is kindness something you can only earn with a title?  

Once those questions enter the room, trust fades quickly. Psychological safety is tossed out the window! When people don’t feel seen or respected, collaboration suffers and the quality of the work we produce together suffers with it. This dynamic ultimately weakens the team.  

Call to Action 

We don’t always get to choose how our actions land, but as leaders, we are responsible for noticing the impact they have on others. Because who you are when titles leave the room…that’s the leadership people remember. 

This type of Leadership can be built in the small, everyday moments.  

Here are a few ways to practice this leadership lesson: 

• Do a consistency check.
  Pay attention to how you show up across different rooms. Does your tone, warmth, and engagement change depending on titles? Ask yourself: Would I speak the same way if leadership wasn’t on this call? Would I speak the same way if leadership was on this call? 

• Lead with curiosity, not hierarchy.
  Take a moment to learn something about the people you work with, regardless of their role. A simple “How are you doing?” or “How was your weekend?” can go a long way in making someone feel seen. You can keep it short if folks aren’t comfortable sharing too much.  

• Practice respect when there’s nothing to gain.
  The true test of leadership is how you treat people who can’t promote you, reward you, or advance your career. Make respect a habit, not a strategy. 

Titles come and go. Meetings end. But how you make people feel stays with them. Be the leader whose consistency treats others with respect, long after the titles leave the room. 

 With love, leadership, and belief in yourself. You got this! 

💖 Jessica